Some Things I Have To Say!!!

[DIOFAN1980]

Well, a rough Sunday after finding out Ronnie James Dio Died, and Tiffany (our Daughter) having some problems during the night Sunday that I won't go into here (she does need all of your good thoughts though), Has left me home by myself on Wednesday Brenda, Tiffy, and Shandi went out to Aunt Donna's for the day, and I really just wanted to stay home and listen to some Dio, Sabbath, Elf, Rainbow, and what have you, trying not to be so freaking depressed.. You know people laughed at me yesterday at work, I guess some found it strange and a little funny that someone could be so upset of a "famous" person's death, but like KISS, Ronnie is more than a ROCK STAR to me, as I have already stated in part, I was 14 years old in 1980 (stoned out of my mind) when I heard my first Black Sabbath album Heaven And Hell, I knew Ozzy was the lead singer before, but I had never heard any of the older Sabbath records until after I heard Heaven And Hell, then one day shortly after getting a copy of said album for myself, I was in a music store and found these two cassettes by a band called Elf "Trying To Burn The Sun" and " Carolina County Ball" I HAD to buy these cassettes (I did), these three albums changed my life in some way, they were also my true introduction to something called Heavy Metal not that the Elf albums are really heavy metal but to me, they are and always will be the beginning of said art form.. A girl at work yesterday that said she would not pick on me over Ronnie's death then turned to me, and said "Hey Gary, Ozzy is, was, and always will be Black Sabbath!!" I thought what the fuck did you just do, her more than anyone (at work) since Ronnie has been sick has known how I feel on the subject..

Anyway, I guess when growing up, the one thing I had that kept me going through all the shit in life was music, I in some way have always looked at the musicians I have always been into as my super heroes and Ronnie James Dio was one of these to me, to me he had powers that no one else had.. I guess there is a little part of me that took KISS Meets The Phantom to heart in 1978 at the age of 12, and really wanted the musicians I loved to be like that.. I really think I have held on to this till at least a few years a few years ago when I realized that most of the so called rock stars I have loved since the 1970's and 1980's are older than Dad (my father in-law) but even then I feel I, still had it in me that in me Musician equals Super Hero up till Sunday May 16, 2010, upon hearing about Ronnie's death, oh I have always really known that they are only human but there was that thought that I didn't really want that to be so, I wanted these people to live forever even if they got to the point in their lives where they didn't make music any more, they to me were to just retire to a mythical place where all Super Heroes go to retire never to really die.. Sorry but I really do feel like I have lost a member of my family, I grew up with me and a bunch of sisters and no father to speak of so, to me these music people that I love are my older brothers that show me how to be a good man to those in my life that love and that love me back, as strange as that sounds, that's how I connect to the music I am into, and the people that make it..

You know it's really kind of funny in a way how you can feel such a connection to people you don't really know and have never met, or someone you never got to know on any personal level.. I can remember an art teacher I had in the 7th grade crying in art class the day after John Lennon died and thinking it was a strange thing that she would be so very upset about someone she didn't really know anything about other then their music and what they let out publicly (which isn't really much when you think about it), I now completely understand her feeling all those many years ago..

I guess in the end I have to say that I am though glad that Ronnie died when he was still home with Wendy and the family and not in a couple of month on the road with Sabbath/Heaven & Hell which I think would have been even harder on his loved ones..

Ronnie I love you for all the joy you gave to me and many many others over the last 52 years through your music, you through your art will live forever more..

Thank You So Very Much And May The God You Served Whichever One It May Have Been Bless You As You Rest From The Life You Led On This Planet..

Always Just A Fan And I Hope A Little Bit More,
Gary A Carter